Laughs, irony, and satire
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|Thoughts for the New Decade 2020|
The doctor says, “Larry, everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?”
When she went before the judge he asked her, “What did you steal?” She replied: a can of peaches.
|1891 U.S. Patent Clarifies Toilet
Paper Roll Direction
Puts to Rest Endless Debate on Subject
Patent Application #465,588 diagram clearly shows paper coming over the top of the paper roll and descriptive text also confirms this is the correct position.
When people see a cat’s litter box, they always say, ‘Oh, have you got a cat?’ Just once I want to say, ‘No, it’s for company!’
a Senior Club
Yesterday my daughter e-mailed me – again – asking why I didn’t do something useful with my time.
The Arizona Department of Safety Officer pulled over pick-up truck owner Mike Murray for a weapons check because of an NRA bumper sticker.
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in
San Francisco's China Town.
A cowboy from Texas attends a social function where Barack Obama is trying to gather support for his Health Plan.
This is terrible. Please don't read it.
to the Anxiety Hot-line"
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
Barack Obama meets with the Queen of England. He asks her, "Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient government?
and The Cigars
A Charlotte, NC, lawyer purchased a box of two-dozen very rare and expensive cigars then insured them against fire among other things.
Yesterday I was at my local Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
|Subject: Dear Boss
I have enjoyed working here these past several years. You have paid me very well, given me benefits beyond belief.
|Understanding Media Spin – A Guide|
|It Happened in Church
You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagined the pain that poor Tom must have experienced.
|The Job Applicant|
|25 Funniest Country Music Song Titles|
"Okay," said God. "You asked for it."
|Getting to the 3rd Grade|
|The Problem with UP|
Bell Labs Proves Existence of Dark Suckers
Real Quotes from
Auto Insurance Claims
"The car in front hit the pedestrian but he got up so I hit him again."
|In Honor of Stupid People|
|A Bricklayer's Lament
Re: Claim no. 54784
|Acme Corp. Sued for Product Liability|
|When Osama bin Laden died...|
|Presidential Press Conference|
|The Differences Between Men and Women|
|Business Meeting Bingo|
If you see a bomb technician running, follow him.
—U.S.A.F. Ammo Troop
| Bon Jour ~ Quotes
The next time there's a war in Europe, the loser has to keep France.
|Brief History of France at War|
|Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?|
|Redneck Engineering – A Quiz|
|Letter from a Marine Recruit|
Those Church Bulletins
It seems as long as there has been an Internet, bloopers from Church Bulletins have been passed around for the innocent good humor they provide.
|Math for the Fast Lane|
|Moses and The Computer|
(Murphy's Laws and other principles of disaster)
|Ode to the Spell Checker|
|Buying Paint Airline Style|
|Genuine Notes from
Patients' Medical Charts
|Reasons Why the English Language
is So Hard to Learn
|Words of Wisdom|
If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?
|Health Tips and News|
Cowboy's Guide to Life
Always drink upstream from the herd.
|The Question of Hell|
|It Must be True,
I Saw it on the Internet
|Darwin Awards — 2000|
|In the Beginning|
|Letter From Camp|
|Letter from Grandma|
|Latest Dog Breeds|
|Santa Answers E-mail|
|Jesus is Watching|
|Socialist to English Dictionary|
|Walk on the Weird Side:
The Best 'News of the Weird' Stories of 1999
|T'was the Night Before Y2K|
|When I was a Turkey|
|Scientific Understanding – A Guide|
|The "In-flight-safety lecture"
and other fun things heard while flying
|On a Desert Island|
|Can You Remember?|
|For the Record|
|Riding a Dead Horse|
|Microsoft Shipping Error|
|How Specs Live Forever
Ever wonder about those specifications you were handed?
|Useful Phrases for the Modern
I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
|Sometimes it DOES take a Rocket Scientist|
|Improved State Mottos|
|U.S. Army Voice Mail Message|
|Employee Performance Evaluations|
|YOU MIGHT BE AN ENGINEER IF...|
|Company Confidential — Internal
Training for Success
Reduction in Personnel
Pilots' Squawks and ground crews' Solutions
New strains appear
Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five-year phased plan for what will be known as EuroEnglish
|Why Arkansas is Everyone's Favorite
"I can't believe that those two would admit how the accident happened."
Only In America
|Notes From An Inexperienced
Chili Taster Named Frank
"These people are crazy."
|You Might be a Liberal If ...
...You can't write or speak the word "he" without following it with, "or she."
|PC Primer & PC Lexicon
Being PC is fun. PCism is not just an attitude, it is a way of life!